Today I feel like a million freakin bucks. Maybe even a billion freakin bucks. Ya know that part in Snow White when she’s dancing around with those birds? Yeah, that feeling.
No I didn’t get a promotion or win the lottery or discover my great aunt Mildred twice removed is a quadrillionaire and wants to give me all the money she made inventing the Clapper. Really, I don’t have a specific reason, other than just being 100% thrilled with how I feel right now. The best part is that it’s not conditional happiness. Back in the day, which was a Wednesday, by the way (Anyone?? Anyone??) it used to be that I was floating along, consistently in a state of meh. Which is really not a great state to be in, in case you don’t know the feeling. Then, something actually sort of bad might happen (I use that term in a relative sense, because “bad” to me could be “no big freakin deal” for someone else) and I would completely melt down. Depression. Bingeing. Isolation. Lather, rinse, repeat. All because I missed the T or my favorite show was interrupted by the State of the Union. Little things. But depression has a way of making the little things into big things.
With the help of Prozac, which I will openly admit I took as recently as last year, I learned to find the balance in life (in time, I came to the realization that I no longer needed the medicine to find that balance and, in fact, felt much more balanced au natural.) That doesn’t mean that I don’t get upset about things, because my husband will be the first person to tell you that my loud, melodramatic Italian side comes out when something pisses me off. What it means is that I’ve learned what things to get upset about and what things to save my breath on.
Recently though, I found that I was letting other people and uncontrollable circumstances rock my boat a little too much. I won’t go into detail, but suffice it to say that someone in a position of power over me was getting my goat about things over which I had no control. Sitting back and watching bad things happen because of this person was really frustrating to me. So I did what I used to do during my ED days,which is bitch and moan about it and let it consume my thoughts. Yeah, not healthy, right?
Then, the other day, I ran across this quote that really changed my perspective on things:
Well, duh. When I saw that quote, it just cracked me over the head with the obviousness of the statement. Of course my bitching and moaning and complaining isn’t going to make another person act the way I want them to because why the hell would it? And has that ever worked for anyone? I seriously doubt it. So the switch came on in my head and I thought, “I have a pretty great life. Why should I spend a second of my time worrying about the way another person lives theirs?” And so I stopped. And it feels good. Birds singing around my head good. Million freakin bucks good.
Amazing what a little perspective can do.
Hope you all have a wonderful day!